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Literature by DSteffi

literature and anime stuffs by crooked-clockwork

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Submitted on
November 4, 2013
Submitted with Writer


1,139 (1 today)
64 (who?)


go into the shower.

put the heat as high

as it will go and watch

your skin turn scarlet.

savor the pain.

        [it's the only way you know

        that you're not dead.]


lather your loofah

with too much soap.

scrub your body

as hard as you can.

pretend depression is filth,

and you're simply washing it off.

keep scrubbing.

don't stop until your skin is raw

and red and the tears are warm

and flow without restraint.

        [letting the tears out

        is the only way to keep from drowning.]


sit in the bottom of the shower

and cry as loud as needed.

use the noise to muffle your tears.

try not to feel the sobs

as they rack your body too hard.

        [everything is too goddamn hard.]


pretend you're ok.

when people ask,

lie and say your fine.

        [know you're not fine.]


when your body is drowning,

try and learn to swim.

know it won't work.

pretend to be ok.

        [everything is a lie.]


try and forget that the world

is a cold, dead place.

try and forget that you're making it worse.

        [and everything you do just makes it worse.]

i honestly dont remember the last time i said that i was ok
and actually meant it. 
Add a Comment:
Irishfury97 Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2014
This was me for the longest time, maybe it still is..either way, great work:)
FierySpark Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you, and i hope things get better. you can always talk to me if theres something bothering you. c:
Beth-BethTheColorful Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
I...I know the feeling
FierySpark Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Beth-BethTheColorful Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
yeah, I guess it's a little sad
gaaralover1234567 Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
i know how u feel i take antidepressant but it dost work  
FierySpark Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm sorry you can relate :(
I hope it gets a little bit easier soon!!
SpazTomato Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist

I understand how you feel because I am the same. I act like I am fine but I am not.


'I wear a mask of lies,

 so no one can see through my disguise.'


~ I repeat this a lot in my mind.


Anyway, Stay strong! :)

FierySpark Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
So do I :/

If you ever want to talk, note me :heart:

You too!! :huggle:
SpazTomato Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Heart Thanks I will! Hug emoticon 
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